Matt Panesh

St George

(Dedicated with love to the BNP)

"For God, and Harry and St George!"

wrote Shakespeare the Bard,

and made him ours,

the ever ready reliable St George

who stuck with us through two world wars

St George,

Patron Saint of...


And so we spread

like a disease

and conquered all of the seven seas

bringing Civilisation with cutting steel,

a hearty Huzzah!

and a damn good eye for other people's Real Estate.

"For God and Harry and St George!"

Patron Saint of...


And there the Dragon he did slay

in a place that's aptly called

St George's Bay.

"For God and Harry and St George!"

Patron Saint of...


And like a leper's skin the Empire cracked,

bits fell off, the system nearly collapsed,

the puss inside began to weep,

and by the way,

St George is also the Patron Saint of Sheep.

"For God and Harry and St George!"

Patron Saint of...

The Teutonic Knights!

The f***ing Germans!

Well, I must admit, I was a bit surprised,

but we won't dwell on the War, or

economic zeal,

instead we'll move along to a different field,

cutting through the mystery,

let's have a look at this man's history.

St George was a Roman soldier, from Anatolia,

born in the late third century, all sources are, however,

hagiography (Which means NOT the verifiable truth).

In 303 he was ordered to take part in a persecution,

but confessed himself to be a Christian and criticised the Royal Decision.

An enraged Diocletion

ordered torture followed by execution,

so he was lacerated

on a wheel of swords,

then decapitated

outside Nicomedia's Walls.

"For God and Harry and St George!"

The shout still outs

in the world of Sports

where every shaven head is clad

in the white and red-striped flag

and we still cheer at the sight of the crest,

and despite all evidence (just look at Wimbledon!)

hold that England is the Best!

"For God and Harry and St George!"

Patron Saint of...

Agricultural Workers, Archers, Armourers, Butchers,

Crusaders, Sheep, Shepherds, Field Workers & Farmers,

Ptuj, Lepers, the Order of the Garter,

Riders, Saddlemakers and of course the Soldiers,

Canada, Cappodocia, Catalonia, Ethiopia

Ferrara in Italy,

Genoa, Georgia, Bulgaria, Lithuania, Malta,

Modica in Sicily,

Slovenia, Amersfoot in the Netherlands,

Corinthians, the Brazillian football team, and naturally England!

Equestrians, Palestinian Christians and the dreadful Syph

Palestine, Aragon, Beirut in the Lebanon and Venice,

Gozo, Moscow and Constantinople,

Skin Diseases, Lod, the plague and Portugal,

Cavalry, Chivalry and Haldern in Germany,

Horses, Horsemen, Husbandmen and Leprosy,

The Scouts, Greece, Herpes, Heide & the Teutonic Knights

"Ladies and Gentleman, I give you George -

He's the Patron Saint

of everything in sight!"

Matt Panesh © 2010